March 29, 2024

There’s a different satisfaction that comes from working for yourself. Since I woke up today, I’ve been working on something. As ever, I was hoping to get to the shop but ended up getting things done on the computer.

Days off from work are great days to get to work. I’m not tired or irritable after having already worked a day. I’ll likely have woken up a little later because sleeping in is its own joy. My time is not managed by bells but by whims. The stress experienced when I’m working at something that I find personally rewarding is joyful.

There’s always one more thing to do. Today, I took some pictures, tweaked the lanterns a bit, did some bookkeeping, ran off a couple of puzzles, and updated the website a little. None of it was what I was hoping to do with my time. I was hoping to go to the shop and work on the resin table that’s been sitting for a couple of weeks now. Waking up early enough tomorrow seems unlikely. Hannah and I both put it at a 25% chance.

This pace and level of stress are sustainable. Having the time and space to work with a problem is constructive. Slowing down to accept this tempo isn’t so easy. I’m so accustomed to being overstimulated that coming down from that takes at least a couple of days. Sitting down to read a book is difficult because it doesn’t move quickly enough. My attention span has become deer-vision.


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