21:27 May 9, 2019
I’m waiting in a windowless room. It’s a small room with a single bed, which has been nicely made with a blue comforter and white fitted and flat sheets. There is one pillow on the bed, in a pillowcase that has been bleached white. I’m sitting on the only chair in the room; it’s a chair that you would find in any waiting room. The cushion is also blue. There is a small black space heater next to the chair. It’s the type that looks like a fan, circular with false blades on the screen.
The bed frame is black. The pillow I brought with me is in a black pillowcase. The carpet in the room is industrial, grey, and rigid.
Above the door, there’s a camera next to a small speaker. Next to the door is a plastic chest of drawers, storing a pillow, blanket, and magazines. On top of the drawers is a translucent blue storage drawer with wires and do-dads in it. Behind the door is a coat rack with five hooks and three white, plastic hangers hanging from the two furthermost apart.
Opposite the door, there’s a nightstand on castors. On the nightstand are a machine, hand sanitizer, and a blue box of tissues. Hanging on the wall above the nightstand is a machine with fourteen wires, about 16-gauge, plugged into it. The wires are hanging loosely on a white plastic hook glued to the wall. Next to the nightstand is a white plastic garbage pail with an empty white bin liner in it. Next to the garbage pail is a lamp with a grey post and a white shade.
The door is slightly ajar, with four wires draped over it.
The ceiling is white, with one light fixture in the centre. There are two fluorescent tubes shielded by a rippled plastic sheet, the kind you would see in any conference room that looks like it was designed in the eighties.
The washroom is down the hall. The tiles are a deep red. The stall doors are Crayola Crayon orange. It’s functional, like any washroom used by a regular stream of strangers.
I’m here for a sleep study. I want more information on why I’m feeling so tired so much of the time. I want to figure out what I can do to feel more rested, alert, energetic, and motivated. I know that I haven’t slept well for a long time but it’s finally starting to wear on me. I’m tired of being tired all of the time.
I’m not expecting anything from this. I really just want some information. Maybe it will reveal something, maybe it won’t. Whatever I can take away from this is good enough for me.
I’m starting to get quite bored. I want to go outside to take a walk. I’m going to go see if I can’t.
22:06
22:21
I just got back from going outside. I kind of have to take a shit but don’t really want to. I don’t know what I’m going to do while sitting on the shitter.
There is no wifi and I have no data left on my phone.
Thinking about having to go is increasing the urge. I had better go.
22:23
22:36
I feel a little bit better after that. I read a bit on my phone.
I’m just trying to pass the time now. There is a lot of waiting. I should probably put on my sweatpants and get comfortable but I’m not sure how long I’ll be waiting.
I brought a book with me. Maybe I should read for a bit. I could also watch a movie.
The longer I sit here, the less comfortable I feel. Actually, I feel increasingly restless. I feel like I could be doing something else but I can’t.
You know, maybe this is a great thing. Not having access to the internet is forcing me to find different things to entertain myself with. I have to actively seek out things to do to keep myself busy. There is no feed to constantly refresh. No emails to check or reply to. No bank statement to look at again. Indeed, there is a bit of a quiet that I don’t usually experience.
My girlfriend is going to sleep so I won’t be texting anyone now, either.
The technician, Kaha, just came in to check that I’m not sleeping. She told me that I have another forty minutes or so to wait before I get plugged in. I’m going to try to read for a bit and see where I get with that.
I better use the toilet in about half an hour. Maybe I’ll step out again in twenty. I’ll have to keep an eye on the clock.
22:50
23:11
I just tried to go outside but I’m locked in for the night. I’ll continue reading, I suppose. I do want to take my shoes off, though. They are becoming rather uncomfortable.
I’ll see how far a mint I picked up at a restaurant a few weeks ago gets me.
23:12
7:21 May 10, 2019
I’m home now. I’m tired. I woke up about an hour ago. It was hard to wake up. My eyes felt dry and heavy.
I’m drinking coffee. I’ll have to take a shit soon.
7:23
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