June 1, 2023

Hit ’em Up” by Tupac has to be one of the most aggressive songs that I know. With the windows rolled down, sunroof open, and the volume up, I was blaring it while driving around today. I couldn’t turn it up loud enough.

I missed my previous car, the one referred to as the “white car.” It was faster, louder, and sexier. I felt better when I drove it than I do this one. This one just doesn’t have that joie de vivre that a good car should. I’ve owned this car for longer than any of my others.

We went for ice cream tonight because we were both a little bitter. I knew I was because of my choice of music and the volume that I’ve been listening to it at. I knew she was, too, because she doesn’t swear so often. The ice cream was nice, even though I was a bitter prick while parking and waiting in line.

Tupac had something to be angry about and he is expressed himself poetically. He wasn’t afraid of what upset him and his music was one way of bringing attention to the issues he was trying to change. His approach wasn’t entirely effective and it did end his life tragically earlier. Still, he found his power and he used it. I admire that. It’s something that I’m not sure the rap stars of today can claim.

I’d have a hard time believing that he was unafraid of the world around him. I’d be more inclined to believe that he acted courageously, that he faced his fears. In doing so he became stronger and gave strength to others. This is something that’s missing from my life, and maybe my world. 

The 90s were a different time. Could we not do better today?

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