NaNoWriMo #5

F— found the post-it note when she emptied her pockets before throwing her jeans in the hamper. “Who would make a note of the fact that they want to love someone?” she thought. “Maybe it wasn’t a reminder, maybe it was a note from one person to another, probably a woman to a man. No, it was from a man to a woman. Coward.”

“He probably left it on the table when she went to the washroom and took off. That was his way of breaking up with her. I wouldn’t have kept the note, either. I might have.

“They must’ve been together for long enough. He’d’ve just ghosted if they’d only been on a few dates. Why do guys do that? Can’t they talk to women anymore?

“I know I’ve ghosted a few guys but we both knew it wasn’t going anywhere. If it was anything serious, which it hasn’t ever been, I’d’ve said something in person or on the phone at the very least.”

F—‘s phoned pinged. It was a text from M—. She read it and then turned off her phone. “He’s nice but there’s something…I don’t know,” she thought. “I guess, he’s cute, but he’s not, like, good looking.” F— looked at her silhouetted reflection on the black screen of her phone. She pursed her lips and turned her head from side to side.

F— was an attractive but awkward woman. She didn’t put energy into conversations she didn’t need to have. More often than not, she was thinking about something instead of focussing on the conversation she was having. When she walked by people in the hallways at her office, she’d say hello but was walking by quickly enough that she could pretend not to hear the, “How are you?” that followed. She’d rather not have to answer the question. She didn’t much care to know how whoever it was felt.

She took care of herself. She ate well, worked out regularly, and had a weekly standing appointment at the nail salon. She wore affordable fashionable clothing and everything she wore fit well. She had become friendly with the seamstress who tailored her clothes. F— cared about her appearance because it made her feel good when she looked good. She noticed when men noticed her.

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